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How To Be Happy

1/21/2016

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Would you agree that either yourself or people you know are searching for happiness?  Many search their entire lives, believing it is somewhere "out there" and when the find "it", they will be happy.  Most people are striving for things or people or event, or "something" that makes them happy.  Yet, when you take a look at the choices and decisions they make, they are not being congruent in what they SAY they want, and the actions they take.

This is revealed in all areas of life.  Let's take a look at a few examples.

Work - How many people go to a job they hate?  According to Gallup at least 70% of employees hate their jobs and are disengaged in the workplace.  Yet, how many of these people, keep going in, day after day, week after week, year after year?  If you hate your job, you are most likely stressed, unhappy, perhaps overworked, and feel a lack of control in your life.  This has a domino effect in a negative way in other areas of your life.  No one can have the type of health or relationships they want, if they are unhappy in their work.  Stress, anger, unhappiness, resentment, etc., will flow into these other areas and you will wonder why nothing seems to go right.  If you hate your job, and are serious about being happier in your life, take a stand right now to DO something about it.  Make a list of all the things you dislike about your job.  Make another list of what you want.  Then, have the courage to make a change.  Start searching for work that ticks everything on your list of what you DO want, and when you find it, take action.

Start a Business - How many people say they want to start a business and then they would be happy, because they call the shots, don't have a boss to answer to, etc.  Yet surprisingly, most that SAY they want a business are not willing to do what it takes.  Most buy their own excuses - they are afraid to take the risk, they don't have the money or the time, the timing isn't right, etc., etc.  It is never a lack of time or money or the absence of fear....it is a lack of desire and commitment.  When you find the business you want, take action and move forward and stop expecting the timing to be right, or the money to fund it to be sitting waiting in your chequing account.  Make the decision and then make the decision go right.

Relationships - How many people are in relationships they are not happy in?  There are two options...you either figure out what is missing, and then do everything in your power to correct that, or, if it is beyond correcting, then it could be time to move on and find the relationship you really want in your life.  Keep in mind this could be tied to your work.  If you are in a job you hate, and you bring that stress home and take it out on your partner, it may not be the relationship, but the job you need to change.  Making that change, could be starting point of improving your relationship.

Health - Do you feel overweight, out of shape?  Do you seem to feel that way over and over again....starting and stopping the latest diet trends or exercise routines?  It isn't the "right" diet that is the magic solution to improving your health and fitness.  It is the THINKING you have around it.  I have observed for years, people piling into a local diet center every week to get "weighed", to be accountable to someone else.  They pay a membership fee for whatever that club provides.  Yet most going in and out are still overweight and have been going for years.  If it was so effective, they would learn how to get in shape and stay in shape.

It starts in our mind.  No matter what anyone tells you, it boils down to putting nutritious food in your body, cutting out the junk, and exercising regularly.  That's it, period!  Start being accountable to yourself, no one else.  DO what you say you are going to do.  Stop buying your own excuses. Buy healthy food.  Find an exercise style you enjoy.  For instance - I do not buy any junk when I grocery shop.  With no junk food in the house, it forces you to create a new eating style.  More than weight loss, it is a desire to stay healthy and live a long active life, and not end up sitting on the sidelines watching life go by.

Finding an exercise style you enjoy is vital in order to stay committed and SELF motivated.  For years I resisted the idea of going to a gym because I have no interest in most of the exercise offered.  Fortunately, I started yoga many years ago and discovered it was perfect for me.  So the key is to find the exercise that suits YOU.  That is how you stay committed to it.  When you enjoy it, and get results, you want to continue and are SELF motivated to do so.

Hobbies - What?  You don't have time for any?  Life is too short to not do what you love.   Hobbies feed our hearts and when you deny yourself this type of pleasure, you are cutting off an important part of who you are.  If you don't have time for hobbies, it is a sign your life is out of balance.  We work to live, we don't live to work.  Engaging in hobbies is one of life's simple pleasures that just makes us feel happy.

Happiness is within us.  When  we make choices that give us a feeling we are living our life on purpose, it creates happiness for no particular reason.  When we continually make choices that we feel we have no control in, it gives us a feeling of  unhappiness and a feeling that we can only be happy when _____ happens.

Someone asked me once why I am so happy.  The only answer I could think of was "because I am in love with my life".  That was 12 years ago, and was a result of finding work I am in love with.   That overflowed into all aspects of my life.   We spend 40 hrs minimum per week working...this is usually where it starts in creating happiness.  Find work that fills your heart with joy, and everything else falls into place.....
​
Debbie Ruston has been an entrepreneur and trainer since 1986. She works with individuals, and groups interested in developing their entrepreneurial leadership mindset. Was this article of value to you? Feel free to share it on your social networks and with your contacts, join in the discussion below, and FOLLOW her on the top right corner of this page.
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As published on Linkedin - 
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/how-happy-debbie-ruston?trk=prof-post
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